This seems like just a normal concert that has reminded us that we are slowly opening things back up as we get more and more people vaccinated, but it is more than that! This concert was rescheduled 4 times! It was one of the first cancelled due to Covid…he literally played on Thursday and this one was cancelled that Friday. It was a reminder that we are not the same people that we were in 2020 and how much has changed! The audience was full of broken individuals that each had a story of loss, hope and redemption. We were changed.
But God is not.
God is the same yesterday, today, forever. We worshipped him big last night! I could not help but look back at all we have gone through and for many still going through. But, it just made my praise stronger for our God who will not waste any of our hurt.
So grateful Zach Williams did not issue refunds and we walked in with our March 20, 2020 paper tickets in hand. We celebrated, cried and proclaimed His name until He returns or calls us home.
So over the past few months I have continued to lose weight without trying. Sounds awesome, but not when you look sick and you are down to a size 0 and under 100 pounds. Only in small outfits does it look sexy…in most clothes I look ill. So I have had to pause Camp Gladiator so I can visit doctors and figure out the root. When you need every calorie, you have zero to burn!
So far I have been to three doctors and received an ultrasound of my thyroid. Gastronologist is next along with a high protein diet, delivered meal plan so I snack all day and eat and protein shakes from Crandall Nutrition. Again, blessed to not worry about losing pounds, but never Google unexplained weight loss.. it is scary! Join me in praying for some direction!
Finally, in all the day to day, I am leaning into my self. Put a pause in working on my relationships, and am focusing on God and my mental health. Sadly, I tend to lose me in us and it is time to look at who God says I am.
Turning 42 flipped a switch. Who am I? Where do I want to be in a year? Who do I want by my side if I have to battle a deadly disease tomorrow? No time to question loyalty…I need to know my team and live in it! Stay tuned for Julia 42.0!
In Lupus related news, I am now on Methextrate and off Plaquenil. Over time, my symptoms began to look more like RA and the joint pain became too much. I now have side effects of headaches and mouth ulcers, but feel better than ever joint-wise. Kinda scared to find out what 62 feels like since 42 already feels like 92, but believing in a cure and a good Lord comeback!
New school year brings new fun and a new level of busyness. I am still teaching 5th grade, but with a new team so that always brings new challenges. This looks to be the first year in three that we might be in school the entire year! I cannot teach virtually ever again so praying we survive the winter! I finally have my joy back in teaching after Covid took it away! This year I am a coach for Battle of the Books, UIL, mentor teacher and Webmaster (ha!). You know I feel good when I choose to add more roles (and work) to an already busy life as mom and teacher.
Hard to believe, but my son is in 3rd grade. I hate how STAAR affects our SPED kids, so I have been dreading this year. Also praying that ridiculous HB4545 disappears because it is doing nothing but making a hard job harder. Hopefully, we can find a place for this test that saves education until then I will advocate as a mom and continue to push through as a teacher.
I stepped out of my comfort zone this summer and joined a Bible Study for women. Not only that, but I led a table group. I struggle being in a room with women that love Jesus because I feel like I fail in being a godly woman. I do not see myself worthy of being a pastor’s wife.
I listen to 90’s rap and like it. On bad days, I catch myself talking gangsta like in the lyrics.
I am good at doing the stanky leg.
I complain and am idle.
I do not like people in my home and buy goodies rather than bake them.
I do not craft…in fact I hate it.
I just do not feel like I represent a woman of the church. But I love Jesus and so do the women I got to “lead” this summer. I wanted to be at the table with my friends or the table with the people my age, but God had a better plan. I was at the table with a mix of ages and he sat me down so that I could be mentored and taught. I gained new friends and grew in my relationship with Christ.
This is Bible Study.
This is the church.
If you have not studied with Ruth Chou, then I encourage you to study Truthfilled. It takes you on a journey through Colossians to learn your identity in Christ. To rehearse His truths. So powerful in this age where we easily get our confidence from likes, views and followers. Truth is what we say to ourselves is everything…so speak truth!
I struggle with this. I put off Bible study to put away dishes. I avoid reading his word to vacuum. I get more concerned about others being impressed with my home I stop to consider how they feel about themselves in my presence. I need to reconsider my priorities.
Teaching is my joy and passion. It is really hard, but this profession impacts lives for a lifetime, so when a former or current student dies it should not be a surprise it is devastating.
Homerooms become a family. We check in every day together. Go to lunch. Travel to other classes. Share our triumphs and struggles. Class parties, awards, field trip lines, class pics, yearbook pages….your homeroom in elementary school is life..good or bad-there is a bond.
15 years later, I still have stories of this group…
Funny stories. Sad stories. Stories of growing as a teacher. This group is now 23 to 24. They are graduates, parents, coworkers, college students, soldiers…they are grown, but I will forever see them as this age right here. My kids in 2008.
So when I learned one died it shook me. When I learned it was due to gun violence it broke me. A young person gone too soon. A flood of memories rushed back…the time I ran into him at the store a couple of years ago…the time he came up to share a hug and hello. Once a student, always a student.
Teaching is hard in moments like these. Teaching sadness is real. Seeing these young people hurt is painful. Knowing it is part of the job to love so big that when you lose one it hurts bad.
But we go back each year and build those relationships and families because that is how we learn. We learn in love and we learn in loss.
RIP A’Daireon. You made me a better teacher. God put us together in 5th grade for a reason. God brought our paths together. I am blessed by you. You will never be forgotten.
What is it with fireworks that make people lose their minds? We live out in the country where popping all explosives is legal. Every New Year and July 4th my house sounds like a war zone. This is not how I was raised. We watched them, but never popped them so seeing this excitement for fire is beyond me.
Personally, they are a waste of money. I said it!
However, the smile it brings my son to hold the lighter and watch it go off. The anticipation of what the firecracker will do…how high…how loud….the colors. He loves it all. The joy my husband feels to put on a show and share that explosion together…it is special.
I pace back and forth ready for the injury, the fire, the accident and 911 call. I am not a fireworks girl-but my boys are so we light em up. Truth is that hour of memories is no different then a dinner night out or buying fancy liquor to drink. You consume it and it is gone. You have nothing left but a memory and maybe a picture, but in that moment it was everything and nowhere else you would rather be.
So rather than be a fireworks waste, I will choose to say fireworks win last night. Memories to last a lifetime and maybe share with his family someday. Happy 4th of July!
I get so annoyed with the posts that say “My _______ is better than yours.” We have all seen them. My best friend, my school, my mom, my husband… First, I know they are not serious but you can share your happiness without putting down mine. Second, you don’t know my mom so how can you say for sure.? Third, it just feels competitive in nature rather than cliche or cute.
Again, just my opinion.
Why not say “I love my mom” or “My mom is the best ” or “Blessed with a great mom. ” Do we really need to bring every person that reads your post into it? We can all shine and be happy for each other. Every time I read one…I rarely smile even though I know it is meant to be funny.
Again, I know I am taking something silly too seriously, but needed to speak out about how this makes me feel…you all may carry on😁😜 If you disagree then just remember “My blog is better….” Just kidding!!
My son has been obsessed with dinosaurs lately. We can thank Jurassic World and Ryan’s toy reviews for that. When I learned the Jurassic exhibit was in Dallas, but required over 25 dollars a ticket and over an hour drive…I stopped to consider if this event was worth it.
The experience was worth the cost. The opportunity to be together as a family. The fact my husband took off of work-shock! The chance to laugh when the unexpected occurred. The feeling of awe as the robots came to life. The smiles, the laughs, the conversations on the way home. The way he tells everyone about it.
Was it costly? Yes. Was it only an hour? Yes. Will we remember it for a lifetime? I hope so.