Remember when we met and you said that adoption was not for you? Remember when agreed to not start trying until we were thirty? Remember going on all those trips that were suppose to be the last trip before conceiving but we always went on another one? Remember finding out I had Lupus? Remember sitting in the doctor’s office and looking at the ultrasound of an empty womb and thinking “the first ultra sound was not suppose to be like this?” Remember hearing the words that I should not get pregnant and likely would not get pregnant? Remember we took a day off from work to just soak those words in? Remember praying not to get pregnant but for God to make us a family and just submitting to His will and not our own? Remember researching all those agencies and going back to one that we got randomly over a year ago? Remember submitting our adoption paperwork in and then immediately driving to Houston to attend a seminar? Remember holding me when I was crying that this was all too hard…remember you reminding me that God has a plan and it will all work out the way it was meant to be and trust Him? Remember the first second and third time that I wanted to quit all this because it was so much work? Remembering wondering boy or girl, blonde hair or brown, blue eyes or brown, light skin or tan and wondering when he/she would be born and all the many details like which hospital, which birth parent, which city, which day…how would it all happen? Remember cleaning, refurnishing, repainting and updating our house for the home study…remember ALL that work? Remember turning in our adoption book and waiting for the phone to ring and thinking we could get a call any day and we would be parents? Remember waiting and waiting for over two months? Remember getting the email that said we had been chosen but she backed out and our book was now back on the table for other birthmoms look at? Remember me wondering if the adoption book was not good enough even though I labored on it for months…day and night…I worked on making that book perfect? Remember getting the call that we had been chosen…and it was a boy….and he would be born on December 17th.. and he was half hispanic and already big? Remember meeting the birthmom and learning December 10th and he was REALLY big? Remember telling all of our family and a few close friends and our jobs, but then keeping the rest a secret because we were so afraid that it would not work out? Remember driving to Houston knowing our son would be born today…and we stopped to take pictures in front of the hospital? Remember seeing him through the nursery for the first time….all nine pounds and fifteen ounces? Remember feeding him for the first time and listening to his sounds and thinking I can’t believe we are HIS parents? Remember going back to the hotel for the first night and downloading ALL the pictures and videos we took (we still take LOTS of pictures)counting the minutes until we could go back to see him and feed him and hold him? Remember waiting in the hospital lobby for his birthparents to sign the papers and feeling relief then joy when they did? Remember driving home with him in the car seat…remembering trying to figure out the car seat? Remember bringing him in our home to meet our parents and our dogs and our friends? Remember taking a picture in front of the Christmas tree then making it Facebook official that he was ours forever? The first time he spit up and the first time he peed on us both and that first day that you had him all by yourself? Remember the first Christmas and the first New Year’s, his circumcision, meeting Santa, getting his shots and the first month being with him together and every month, week and day thereafter?
My dear husband…we did the right thing. All these memories led us to this adoption day when he will officially be ours forever and I could not be happier. Thank you for being there through it all…we did it!!!
Love, your wife