So, we are learning that Human Resources sees adopting a baby differently than having a baby.  If you give birth to a baby, they allow a spouse to use sick days to help care for the infant and the mama so the time off can be paid.  However, in the case of adoption, they will only allow you to use vacation time then take unpaid leave.  The employer will give you the time off, but it will not be paid unless you have saved up vacation time.  My husband had lots of sick days saved up in hopes to use them when we brought the baby home.  We both figured a baby is a baby and needs constant care whether it came out of my canal or not.  We also thought his days were his days, but…not so according to Human Resources.

I kinda see their point in that I am not in the hospital and not recovering, but I thought employers and laws would protect adoption a little more than it does.  California has changed their laws to accomodate adoptions and still give their residents paid leave if they have accrued the time.  I am sure as adoption becomes more common than other states will follow suit.  I know I shouldn’t complain as many friends on here have reported the lack of medical care costs being covered in infertility treatments.  However, I was surprised that the rationale in a spouse helping with a newborn would be different in adoption.  It just reminds me again that because my body cannot support carrying a baby that we have to jump through hoops to be accomodated in adopting one.

The good news is: the fact that we are having this problem is a sign that we are preparing for a baby.  It would be more comfortable for us to use his sick days so he can be paid while we both bond with our son.  We wanted to save his vacation days for the days that we can take a vacation and not worry about sleepless nights and spit-up.  But, if we are going to have a problem then this is a good one to have!