Last night, I got to meet up with my girlfriends of the dinner club for some great mexican food, tasty margaritas and most important, fabulous laughs and conversation. The dinner club started back in 2004 (I think) with a group of four women (there were originally five, but she only lasted one month) that were all teachers that all worked at the same school. The goal was to meet once a week by cooking each other dinner in our homes. I must say when those women met at my home every four months I did a much better job of keeping it clean! Back then there were not any kids…today there are eight…seven girls and one boy! We are all still happily married, but two of the women no longer work at the school (one is a nurse and one is a preschool teacher/stay at home mom), and we no longer meet in our homes every month….we meet at a mexican restaurant every four months or when one of us takes the time to organize all our schedules.
We have been through so much as a solid group of women. Anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, deaths, job promotions, kids being born, kids getting sick, kids in dance or sports, kids getting in trouble, kids getting awards, separations, troubled marriages, healthy marriages, changing churches, baptisms, changing jobs, going back to school, staying at home, pregnancies, miscarriages, infertility, drinking too much, talking too much, graduations, vacations, moving, Lupus, adoption and the list could go on and on. I am probably leaving out a lot of good stuff, but you get the point…eight years of living life together as women. We talk about it all and we are there for each other through it all. We each have different levels of friendship outside of the club, but what makes it work is that no matter how long it has been since we have last talked…at dinner club it is like it was yesterday. I know I can count on them for anything and they know they can count on me. I wish I could post a variety of pics throughout the years, but we have not taken many pics; that could change in the future.
(Quick side note on dinner club: it started out being called the SSS-secret society supper, but there was nothing secret about it and it was easier to write DC on our calendars so it changed. Secondly, each of us hosts our meals very differently. I set the bar crazy low for the first meal when I served barbecue that I had left over on paper plates with no formal set up. I also have a bad habit of forgetting to clean the bathroom and my dogs jump on everybody (I’m no Martha Stewart). Jenny is the hostest with the mostest by using her fine china, chilling our drinks on a bed of ice, creating these fruit bouquets and providing flavored water. Jodie and Marla are unique with each of them cooking these great meals from scratch or these amazing desserts freshly baked and then always providing meals to go in reuseable tupperware. They both are great at scrapbooking and photography as well. Anyway, back to my post.)
I say all this to say that power of girlfriends is immeasureable. In my early marriage, I was one of those girls that felt glued to my husband. I loved doing everything with him and would often neglect my girls to be with him or even worse only called them when he was busy. I hate when women do that! However, my marriage hit a rough spot where I thought it was over and for the moment I was without a man. All I had were my girls (not just dinner club, but my soccer team, church class, school teammates, and my best friend of all time, December). I realized in that crisis that there is room for both your man and your women. Some things your man does not want to talk about and there step in your girls!
I remember one day just being so pitifully alone in my house and just wanting to dwell on my loneliness when a friend called because she was thinking about me. At the time, I had an answering machine and I could hear her message giving me encouragement, but I never picked up the phone. It was enough that she called. That’s all I needed. Only a girlfriend would have thought to cheer me up like that…even though she never knew I was on my couch crying.
Which brings me to why this is on my blog. I have needed these women while on this journey and praise God I have always had them. Imagine the roller coaster of falling in love, healing a marriage, trying to conceive, being infertile, diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, and exploring adoption. Be thankful if you have an arsenal or army of loving women. Men have their priority in our lives, but is there is nothing like the power of a girlfriend!!!
The good news is: I am not a huge girly girl, but I will always value my lady friends. God knew I needed these women to be my voice of reason and encouragement. So thankful that they love me and value me and will listen when I need it, but they also call me out when I don’t. You can’t beat a good friend.